Farmer: Is that one a boy or a girl?
Me: How the hell should I know?
Farmer: Lift its tail!
Me: [Lifting calf's tail.] I can't see anything.
Farmer: Well, have a feel.
Me: I'm sorry, but you can fuck right off! This is where I draw the line. I am not about to start feeling up cattle!
(Not that I'd have been any the wiser if I had.)
Sexing Kittens: When I was growing up, we had to do a similar thing with two new kittens, and it eventuated in our naming them 'Mork' and 'Mindy'. One day, a few years later, Mork had kittens of
hisher own! For years, we thought we had the art of sexing cats down to a fine art, but it turns out, we were shite at it! The irony is, in series 4 of the TV series of the same name, it was Mork that had the baby, not Mindy (three the hard way). Spooky or what!