I'll tell you what's stupid: when you raise your glass to someone and say something nice about them, it's called a toast—even though there is absolutely no toast involved.

Wouldn't it make a lot more sense to raise a piece of toast?

Someone should do something.

See also: Toasts

Filed under: Nonsense

Richard Carter

A fat, bearded chap with a Charles Darwin fixation.


  1. You could go even further & have the topping on the toast to match your opinion of the person being 'toasted' eg. raspberry jam or crab paste.....any other ideas?

  2. The following is totally pasted from somewhere or other and it seems to get backing from several other sources. It seems like a sensible initial use and then a slip into metaphor. Apparently drinking to the 'health' of ladies was all the rage. CP

    The term originates from the sixteenth century when a small piece of bread would be placed in a goblet of wine, which would be passed from guest to guest until it reached the person being honored who would drain the goblet and eat the morsel of bread in the bottom.

    In English, the word "toast" comes from the British practice of floating a piece of spiced or sweetened toasted bread on top of the wine, ale, or mead of the loving cup. This was an ancient custom deriving from the tradition of the Eucharistic religious events of history. After the bowl had been shared by all guests, the host was expected to drink the last drops and consume the toast in honor of the guests and devotion to his Deity.

    When there was no toast, they used talks about beautiful women as the spice of drink. "Madame, hasn't it been your whole life's pride to be the common toast of every public table?" (1705).

    "the name of the lady whose health was being drunk flavoured the drink like the pieces of spiced toast formerly placed in wine."

  3. I have decided to award myself the title
    S.A.O.L. can you guess what it stands for?
    (think British music press around the early 1970s)

  4. Penis spelt with an 'M' that's original!
    It actually stands for Smart Arsed One Liner
    (N.M.E. letters pages ca. 1972)

  5. Penis spelt with an 'M' that's original!
    It actually stands for Smart Arsed One Liner
    (N.M.E. letters pages ca. 1972)

  6. Sweaty Anorexic Oversexed Lesbian?
    You snotty faced heap of parrot droppings!

  7. I was just thinking of the 'British music press around the early 1970s' clue. Are you sure it isn't:

    Self Appointed Overbearing Loudmouth

    (BTW, you only need to post your comments once.)

  8. OOo, such a way with words. Hmmm, night spelt n-i-t-e that's original. Any more pearls from the Scruffy Amateur Outspoken Lowlife?

  9. I think you upset Mr Owl. Whats he done to hurt you. He was only trying to be clever & you went & made him cry! You sanctimonious
    anachronistic overbearing luddite! Perhaps Mr Titcher could come up with the ultimate one?

  10. Why can't we all just be friends and love each other? Then the planets will align and there will be peace and harmony forever.

    Let's all be smiley and optimistic luvvies.

  11. You know, he's absolutely right. We shold all get together & sing songs about saving the rhino! Smile And Ooze Love!

  12. Coldn't find any songs about rhinos....but
    There was an album by Man called Rhinos Winos & Lunatics, a band formed by Billy Mundi of the Mothers called Rhinoceros, a band called Dust Rhinos, 'Rhino' Rodney Slater of the Bonzos, and Marcel Proust had a rhino (or was it a haddock?)

  13. There is also a song by Smashing Pumpkins called Rhinoceros, and a children's song called Rhinoceros Tap!

  14. and don't forget the wonderful American label Rhino Records on Sunset Blvd. and the song 'Go To Rhino Records' by Wild Man Fischer (check him out, he's awesome!)

  15. I am sure that the author of A la recherche du temps perdu would not have had a pet haddock, as the word haddock is far too woody.
    He would probably have had a tench as it has a much tinnier sounding name!

  16. How in the name of DNA do you keep a pet haddock (or a tench for that matter)?

    And anyway, this has exactly what, to do with toast?

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