Irritating tickle

I’m at the back end of a three-day cold, and have developed an irritating tickle in my throat which causes me to cough with irksome regularity. It occurs to me that the Irritating Tickle would make an excellent stage-name for a clown magician.

Urgent consignment

When you've lived in Hebden Bridge for as long as I have, you become accustomed to seeing peculiar things. But, on occasion, you can still be taken by surprise.