Sports buff

Her Majesty was in the region yesterday to open the Commonwealth Games: individuals from 72 geographical entities (most of them places you've never heard of), competing for recognition as the greatest athlete in the erstwhile British Empire (excluding certain nations who are too stuffy to join the commonwealth - yes, I have you in mind, Ireland!). Hooray!

The thing I hate most about the Commonwealth (and Olympic) Games is the gymnastics. I mean, all that prancing about, waving ribbons, and spinning through hoops. That's not sport!

Distrust any so-called sport that:

  1. is only done by women,
  2. is done to music, or
  3. has points awarded for "artistic merit".

You know the sort of thing I'm talking about: synchronised swimming, netball, ice dancing, most gymnastics... all of them absolute shite.

Having said that, did you know that the word gymnasium comes from the ancient Greek, gunnazein, meaning naked exercise? Now that I'd be prepared to pay to see!

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Filed under: Nonsense

By Richard Carter

A fat, bearded chap with a Charles Darwin fixation.

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