I'm sort of half-watching StarTrek Voyager on telly as I type, and I've just worked out that the so-called science officer is a total fraud. He's just spent five minutes standing in the background pretending to be playing on a computer or something, while some alien doctor (whom I don't trust one iota, by the way) spouted total pseudo-scientific bollocks to some other short-arse alien with spots on his face, whom I gather is one of the crew. So how come the science officer didn't step in there and point out that the first alien was talking through his anus (assuming he has one, that is)? It's obvious: he doesn't know the first thing about science (and no, Mr Science Officer, don't you give me any of your "Emergency containment field activated" nonsense, I'm not buying it!).

Oh, the alien doctor's just died. I guess he didn't have an ulterior motive after all.

See also: This evening's Star Trek TNG

Richard Carter

A fat, bearded chap with a Charles Darwin fixation.

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