Rather fishy

Pine air freshener

You must have seen those silly pine-tree-shaped pine-scented air-fresheners they have in cars… Do you see what they've done there? They've made the air-freshener into the shape of the thing that it smells like. Clever marketing ploy, or what?

The other day, I couldn't help noticing that a colleage had an air-freshener in the shape of a dolphin hanging from the rear-view mirror of their car. I have never smelt a dolphin, but I don't imagine it's the sort of smell I'd want wafting through my car. Rather fishy is how I imagine a dolphin would smell. But I could be wrong.

How about you lot? Have any of you ever smelt a dolphin? If so, what did it smell like? Is it the sort of smell you'd want wafting through your car?

I need to know.

Richard Carter

A fat, bearded chap with a Charles Darwin fixation.


  1. OK, Nite Owl, this is getting seriously spooky: I almost added a little bit at the end of this item about the smelt fish... And I know EXACTLY how you got there:

    You saw my use of the word 'smelt', thought 'surely that should be "smelled"!', Googled it, and discovered that there is a fish called a smelt (and that 'smelt' is indeed the past participle of 'to smell').

    How do I know all this? Because that's exactly what I did too!

    This Gruts nonsense gets kind of scary at times.

  2. ...oh, and I don't see any funny A's - but I have seen similar in the past: it's to do with fonts and browsers and obscure bugs in the commenting system I knocked together. But, if I can't see the bug, it's very difficult for me to fix it!

  3. Nice try but wrong!! I am fully aware of the existance of the Smelt and have been for a considerable time. It goes like this:-

    On the live bootleg version of the 'Don't eat the yellow snow suite' by Frank Zappa , (Sydney, 26.6.73) Frank refers to a character named St. Alfonso. He states that St. Alfonso is the patron saint of the Smelt fishermen of Portuguese extraction. You should have guessed there would be a FZ connection in there somewhere.

    There is an amazing cartoon version of Don't eat the yellow snow on youtube. Unfortunately, the St. Alfonso section of the piece doesn't feature on this. Check out the FZ album Apostrophe(')

  4. Seeing the air-freshner in the shape of a pine tree - I'm always intrigued by dog biscuits shaped like bones - does anyone seriousy believe that dogs arefooled by this?

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