Gruts

BBC: Intel focuses on new 'super' chip

The new chip will be launched in 2005

That chip is enormous—it must be at least 15 storeys high!

BBC: Full text: [President Bush's] State of the Union address (21-Jan-04)
…Had we failed to act, Security Council resolutions on Iraq would have been revealed as empty threats, weakening the United Nations and encouraging defiance by dictators around the world. Iraq's torture chambers would still be filled with victims, terrified and innocent.

BBC: High fish numbers boost angling

I visited my parents last night. The following conversation took place as we were watching a programme on BBC4 about the painter, Paul Gauguin, presented by arts critic, Waldemar Janusczak:

Janusczak: The death of Gauguin's mother had an incalculable effect on his psyche…
Dad: What the hell does that mean?
Me: It's Jungian psychoanalytical bollocks.
Dad: But what does it mean?
Mum: It means he was very upset.

"Do you sell cards for people wanting to decline wedding invitations?"
"Do you want a single one or a pack?"

Hebden Bridge Times (30-Apr-04)
Mytholmroyd's World Dock Pudding Championships ditched tradition this year by voting a veggie version top of the puds. Newcomer Jette Howard's vegetarian recipe wowed the judges at Mytholmroyd Community Centre where hundreds gathered to see her take the title.
—Full story page five

For the uninitiated, dock pudding is a West Yorkshire delicacy made from dock leaves, nettles, onions, oatmeal, and (usually) bacon fat (plus a few other secret ingredients). Traditionally served with a full-English breakfast, it looks like rancid pond weed, but tastes surprisingly wonderful.

I was sitting at home last weekend, wondering, as I often do, what the point of sociology is. So I decided to find out by emailing an expert, Professor of Sociology, Laurie Taylor, of BBC Radio 4's Thinking Allowed (a programme I genuinely enjoy—if only, some weeks, for its brilliant title):

Dear Laurie Taylor and the Thinking Allowed team,

I often manage to catch your programme, which is usually very interesting - but I am always left with one nagging question:

What on earth is sociology *for*?

I don't want to be rude, but I'm guessing from the –ology suffix that it aspires to be treated as a proper scientific discipline. Interesting though your programme undoubtedly is, however, I've never heard anything on it that could be labelled as a scientific hypothesis, let alone a theory.

So what is sociology for?

Answers on a post card, please to:

Richard Carter
[My address]

You can imagine my pleasure when Prof. Taylor chose to open this week's programme by reading out a large chunk of my email, and to make reference to it throughout the rest of the programme.

…Well, almost.

This morning, I sent another email to Prof. Taylor:

Dear Laurie Taylor,

Thank you for reading out my email and referring to it throughout your programme this week.

I'm sorry I made you feel defensive. Perhaps that explains why you felt the need to use the old rhetorical trick of misquoting somebody and then ridiculing (albeit in a humorous way) something they never said.

As we both know, I did not say that sociologists never come up with hypotheses or theories - any idiot can do that (indeed, sociologists seem particularly adept at it); I said that I had never heard anything on your show that could be labelled as a *scientific* hypothesis or theory. There is a world of difference - but a sociologist probably wouldn't appreciate that.

I also couldn't help noticing that you made no attempt to answer the central question of my email, namely what is sociology for? Although the tone of my email was characteristically - and I hope appropriately - light-hearted, this was a genuine question that I thought might make an interesting topic for discussion on your programme. Any discipline that, as you explained this week, awards Ph.Ds for asking people questions about their mantelpieces clearly has some explaining to do.

Regards,

Richard Carter

It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

I don't care if they're genuine or not, SchoolZone's alleged list of metaphors from actual GCSE essays has just had me laughing my head off—like a man who can see the funny side of being decapitated.

BBC: Basques mourn symbolic oak tree
Authorities in the Spanish city of Guernica are mourning the death of a 146-year-old oak tree seen as a symbol of Basque nationalist pride…

The tree was the third "Guernica oak", continuing a tradition that stretches back to medieval times. The first tree to stand on the spot was planted in the 14th century and lived for about 400 years. According to legend, King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella came to Guernica in 1476 and swore an oath under the tree, pledging to maintain the Basques' ancient privileges…

Basque regional presidents still swear a modern-day oath of loyalty to the Basque people under the tree.

Officials say the now-dead oak will be preserved in the council's gardens alongside its two predecessors.

A replacement tree will be planted in January.