This is the one I’d get: (See what I did, there?)
cats
Parcel farce
Cat delivered alive and well after spending eight days in the post.
Vertical lateral thinking
In which I describe a win-win-win solution to an environmental time-bomb.
Catzinger
The Pope loves cats. I rest my case.
Near miss
Had Frederick Miller not lost an eye in a freak golfing accident back in 1885, I might be Prime Minister right now.