Undies

According to a passing visitor, gruts is Kiwi slang for underpants. Cool.

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I need to get my ears tested

Conversation at work: "I remember when I was on my sex-change course…" "What did you just say?" "I remember when I was on my exchange course…"

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Precision surgery

Conversation with Carolyn while removing a splinter from her finger with a tiny pair of tweezers: C: "Richard, why is your hand shaking like that?" R: "Parkinson's."

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Just for the record

Irish Mick just emailed me to point out that my last one to him had kisses at the end. Look, I was tired, and for some reason I signed off with the valediction I usually reserve for Stense. Sorry to have got your hopes up there, Mick.

Psychobollocks

Observer: Students face personality tests for university places [UK Government] Ministers want universities to adopt methods such as psychometric testing, the psychological questionnaires widely used in City recruitment which explore personality traits and ability to learn, and US-style aptitude tests as fairer ways of assessing teenagers. And these morons have been put in charge of… Continue reading Psychobollocks

Ruddy hell!

BBC: Duck cull ruffles feathers The [UK] government is planning a nationwide cull of ruddy ducks to protect another species from extinction. Forget the ruddy ducks, when are we going to cull some ruddy cats?

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Something I could have done without

New entry on my list of items I would like to see consigned to Room 101: Having your clutch cable snap on a motorway approach-road roundabout.

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Tate doors

The entrance to the Liverpool Tate Gallery has twin revolving doors, one marked IN, the other marked OUT. Doesn't that kind of defeat the whole point of having revolving doors in the first place?

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