Gruts

I like the cut of this fellow's jib (and, indeed, his giblet):

Pledgebank: I will buy a steak every time an animal rights activist threatens or harrasses any other person but only if 10 other people will buy meat when they do this too.

— David Quinn

Do you see what he's doing there? He's messing with what's left of their minds. Very clever.

Here's another one that will do their heads in:

Guardian: When meat is not murder
Would you eat steak if it had been grown in a petri dish?

Go on, then, liberate that!

BBC: Triumphant England reclaim Ashes

Kevin Pietersen hit his first ever Test century on day five at The Oval to set up the draw England needed to win the Ashes for the first time since 1987.

Doesn't your heart go out to those poor, sport-mad Aussies at a time like this?

Nah, mine neither.

…And the award for the What Would Have Been the Bizarrest Opening Phrase in a News Story Ever Only a Week Ago, but Now We Know Better award goes to:

BBC: New Orleans 'security restored'

The US government says it is now in control of New Orleans…

Conversation at Tesco:

Checkout girl: Oooh! What an enormous, flabby penis!
Me: I beg your pardon!
Checkout girl: What an enormous bag of peanuts!
Me: Oh, right! Yes… They're for my garden bird-feeder.

I could have written for The Two Ronnies you know.

• Comedy classic
• Conversation at the Tesco delicatessen counter
• Overheard at the Tesco checkout
• Overheard in the poultry section at Tesco
• Coffee
• For goodness' sake, put it away!
• Weighty matters

…and its name is Bruce Springsteen:

BBC: Academics to debate Springsteen

The life and works of Bruce Springsteen are to be discussed by academics at a conference devoted to the star…

Discussions include "A Marxist Perspective on Darkness on the Edge of Town" and "The Boss and the Bible".

I bloody hate sociologists (not, it has to be said, without good reason). Why do they insist on trying to be so bloody academic all the time—without actually saying anything of note whatsoever, I mean? Why can't they just say, Bruce Springsteen makes great music? Because he does actually make great music—even though it's not particularly cool to admit it.

Another thing it's not particularly cool to admit is that Fitz is (occasionally) correct: I once asked him "What the hell is sociology, then?", and he replied "The Society section of the Guardian posing as science."

Oh bugger and dammit:

BBC: Delta bluesman R L Burnside dies

Mississippi bluesman R L Burnside, a guitarist who only found fame late in life, has died, aged 78.

If you get the chance, listen to RL's fabulous album Come On In—particularly track 3, Let My Baby Ride. You won't regret it.