BBC: Prince Harry deployed to Afghanistan
Prince Harry yesterday.
Yes, that should sort things out for a while.
BBC: Prince Harry in Brazil: I can't find love, says royal
Prince Harry has admitted he sometimes wishes he was "normal" and suggested his royal role can put women off.
Harry, your lack of appeal to women has nothing to do with your role, and everything to do with your being a nasty little ginger shit who attends Nazi-dress parties.
I heard it on the radio first: John Terry has been stripped of the England captaincy by Capello!
Yes, that's right: someone I had never heard of had been removed as 'England captain' by someone else I had never heard of for bending one into the ex-girlfriend of a team-mate.
For those of you as baffled as I was, John Terry, it turns out, is—or, rather, was—the England Men's Soccer team captain. In other words, an overpaid, coiffured softie who can kick a ball. Apparently, captain is official BBC short-hand for men's soccer captain.
Meanwhile, in real sports news, the 2010 Six Nations Championship opens today.
(That would be men's rugby union, for the totally clueless.)
Postscript: Noooooooo!!! BBC: Prince Harry to become RFU vice-patron. If the nasty little ginger shit wants vice, he should follow the footie!
BBC: Charles proud of returning Harry
Prince Charles has spoken of his "great relief" at the safe return of his son Harry, after 10 weeks with his regiment on the frontline in Afghanistan.
That's as may be. But he's still a nasty little ginger shit who bears an uncanny resemblance to Major James Hewitt (rtd).
Wonder if any of our rare harriers have been downed in Helmand Province recently. Cherchez le prince!
Nasty little ginger shit.
That's how I will be referring to the third in line to the throne from now on.
What a total wanker.
It's inherited through the Y chromosome, apparently.
Clarificatory postscript: The nasty little ginger shit should not be confused with the song Holding Back the Years by Simply Red. The latter is a nasty little ginger's hit.