As you might have noticed, the Gruts website is looking slightly different. I’ve given it a modern single-column look. This will make it more suitable for all those cool kids who do their World-Wide-Web-surfing on their mobile telephones and iTablets.
I’ll also be making some changes behind the scenes over the next few days, so things might be a bit disorganised and ropey for a while.
(More disorganised and ropey than usual, I mean.)
I’m not dead.
I visited hospital for a quick in-and-out operation yesterday. Well, more of a quick pop-it-back-in operation. After waiting more that a decade in the vain hope it might magically sort itself out, I finally got round to having my hernia fixed.
In the pre-op interview, the anaesthetist asked if I was allergic to anything:
—Don’t worry, I don't think we’re likely to encounter any of those in the operating theatre.
—Not if your CAT scanner is working.
—Blimey, that was quick! she laughed.
I didn’t like to admit I’d been waiting over 11 years to repeat my legendary CAT-scanner joke.
—Any other allergies?
—Avocados: I’ve not heard that one before! How does the allergy manifest itself?
—You really don’t want to know.
—I see. Not to worry, I won’t be administering any intravenous guacamole.
Still, we thought we’d better play it safe:
I’m not watching the soccer, but, dear England fans, the moment to get really worried is when the commentators start using the phrase ‘still mathematically possible’.