Dolphin, fish, bird!

Jen and I were on holiday in Anglesey the week before last. There's a selection of photos here, if you're even vaguely interested (or even if you're not).

Long-term Gruts readers will no doubt recall that, two years ago, fresh back from another holiday in Anglesey, I delighted them with a photograph of a heron being startled by a dolphin. How could Richard possibly top that, I hear you ask.

Oh ye of little faith! Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Dolphin, fish, bird!

Dolphin, fish, bird!

It's a gift.

Back me up, my fellow humans!

I think I might be turning into my dad. I just spent five minutes arguing with a car-wash, explaining to the ‘stupid bloody machine’ that, despite what it had just told me seven times, the code 699-698 was indeed valid, and that I was perfectly capable of entering six digits.

SEE!...

Car-wash receipt

Diana ditch

BBC: Diana death: New information assessed by Scotland Yard

The Metropolitan Police is assessing new information it has recently received about the deaths of Princess Diana and Dodi Al Fayed in 1997.

If I were a conspiracy theorist, I might point out how deeply suspicious it is that this story has broken just a couple of weeks before the premier of a brand new Princess Diana biopic.

Mind you, if I were a conspiracy theorist, I would no doubt also point out that Princess Diana was assassinated with a lethal MMR injection administered by MI6 agents working for Big Pharma, while Dodi Fayed was a lizard in human form who was abducted by aliens because Prince Philip didn't like the cut of his jib.

And have you noticed how ‘Princess Diana’ is an anagram of ‘rancid pansies’ (and ‘sardines panic’)? Well then!

Surf's up

The Official Bruce Springsteen Website: Notes from the road: Leeds

As an enchanted full moon week in the British Isles and end of tour madness continues to thoroughly infuse Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band, tonight [Wed, 24-Jul-2013] they opened the brand new, cozily intimate (13,500) Leeds Arena…

For “Hungry Heart” Bruce went to the back of the pit and greeted those in the theater-style seats, who were standing and cheering enthusiastically. He took the opportunity of being in such a small, intimate setting to crowd surf to the stage

I can confirm that the Boss did indeed crowd surf.

Bruce Springsteen surfs the crowd
Bruce Springsteen surfs the crowd.

Bruce Springsteen is 63 years old.

A miracle child!

And, lo, it came to pass that a child was born in lowly Paddington, to humble parents. And all of heaven did rejoice, and all the people in all the lands of the Earth did raise up their voices and sing, for it was a miracle child. For, in all the history of mankind, no woman did ever bear child before.

And the Earth did shake. And men did converse with wolves. And the great enemy of the south was thwarted. And Vanessa Hudgens did share bikini holiday snaps with her blonde pal. And horses did enter burger restaurants. And Big Pharma did mobilise patients in battle over drugs trials data.

And there was an end to war and pestilence. And peace fell across all the lands. And God saw, and said it was good.

Amen.